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It saddens me to see girls proudly declaring they’re not like other girls – especially when it’s 41,000 girls saying it in a chorus, never recognizing the contradiction. It’s taking a form of contempt for women – even a hatred for women – and internalizing it by saying, Yes, those girls are awful, but I’m special, I’m not like that, instead of stepping back and saying, This is a lie…The real meaning of “I’m not like the other girls” is, I think, “I’m not the media’s image of what girls should be.” Well, very, very few of us are. Pop culture wants to tell us that we’re all shallow, backstabbing, appearance-obsessed shopaholics without a thought in our heads beyond cute boys and cuter handbags. It’s a lie – a flat-out lie – and we need to recognize it and say so instead of accepting that judgment as true for other girls, but not for you.

— Claudia Gray (via leaveoutviolence-us)

09.16.14 2

micdotcom:

19 #WhyIStayed tweets everyone needs to see

While many cheered the NFL’s move to (finally) punish Rice’s vicious behavior, too many media outlets immediately fell into a tired pattern of victim blaming. 

Writer Beverly Gooden had heard enough. “I was watching the responses to the TMZ on my timeline, and I noticed a trend. People were asking ‘why did she marry him?’ and ‘why didn’t she leave him,’” Gooden told Mic. “When I saw those tweets, my first reaction was shame. The same shame that I felt back when I was in a violent marriage. It’s a sort of guilt that would make me crawl into a shell and remain silent. But today, for a reason I can’t explain, I’d had enough. I knew I had an answer to everyone’s question of why victims of violence stay. I can’t speak for Janay Rice, I can only speak for me.”

Gooden decided to change the conversation. Follow micdotcom

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talis-vita-est:

We learn at an early age to let go of things that burn us.
But when do we learn we are not to return to them seeking out warmth?

09.08.14 304
In the 1890s, when Freud was in the dawn of his career, he was struck by how many of his female patients were revealing childhood [sexual] victimization to him. Freud concluded that child sexual abuse was one of the major causes of emotional disturbances in adult women and wrote a brilliant and humane paper called “The Aetiology of Hysteria.” However, rather than receiving acclaim from his colleagues for his ground-breaking insights, Freud met with scorn. He was ridiculed for believing that men of excellent reputation (most of his patients came from upstanding homes) could be perpetrators of incest.
Within a few years, Freud buckled under this heavy pressure and recanted his conclusions. In their place he proposed the “Oedipus complex,” which became the foundation of modern psychology… Freud used this construct to conclude that the episodes of abuse his clients had revealed to him had never taken place; they were simply fantasies of events the women had wished for… This construct started a hundred-year history in the mental health field of blaming victims for the abuse perpetrated on them and outright discrediting of women’s and children’s reports of mistreatment by men.

― Lundy Bancroft

(via proletarianprincess)

read this carve it into your brains permanently etch it into your skulls r e a d  t h i s

(via miss-mizi)

NEVER.
FORGET.

(via feministbatwoman)

09.04.14 40006

thepeoplesrecord:

Columbia student will carry her mattress until her rapist exits school
September 2, 2014

While most students at Columbia University will spend the first day of classes carrying backpacks and books, Emma Sulkowicz will start her semester on Tuesday with a far heavier burden. The senior plans on carrying an extra-long, twin-size mattress across the quad and through each New York City building – to every class, every day – until the man she says raped her moves off campus.

“I was raped in my own bed,” Sulkowicz told me the other day, as she was gearing up to head back to school in this, the year American colleges are finally, supposedly, ready to do something about sexual assault. “I could have taken my pillow, but I want people to see how it weighs down a person to be ignored by the school administration and harassed by police.”

Sulkowicz is one of three women who made complaints to Columbia against the same fellow senior, who was found “not responsible” in all three cases. She also filed a police report, but Sulkowicz was treated abysmally – by the cops, and by a Columbia disciplinary panel so uneducated about the scourge of campus violence that one panelist asked how it was possible to be anally raped without lubrication.

So Sulkowicz joined a federal complaint in April over Columbia’s mishandling of sexual misconduct cases, and she will hoist that mattress on her shoulders as part savvy activism, part performance art. “The administration can end the piece, by expelling him,” she says, “or he can, by leaving campus.”

Read more

As painful as I know the constant reminder of attending school with her rapist must be, I’m glad she won’t be the only one forced to remember. I hope the rapist drops out immediately…or better yet, I hope he faces the justice he deserves. 

09.03.14 150764
Style has a profound meaning to Black Americans. If we can’t drive, we will invent walks and the world will envy the dexterity of our feet. If we can’t have ham, we will boil chitterlings; if we are given rotten peaches, we will make cobblers; if given scraps, we will make quilts; take away our drums, and we will clap our hands. We prove the human spirit will prevail. We will take what we have to make what we need. We need confidence in our knowledge of who we are.

Nikki Gionvanni

File this under facts on facts.

This makes me think of a beautiful post that I mentioned in one of my Read This Week features; a post by @HarrietThugman about Black people of other cultural backgrounds who diminish Black American culture, and shouldn’t….for it is so rich.

My cultural heritage involves a mixture of my love for some things specific to Jamaican culture (because of my background, being raised in a Jamaican family by Jamaican parents, but being raised in America and actually born in America) and some things specific to being an American Black (I love how Nikki says Black is the NOUN and American is the adjective), and some things that seems to connect Black people despite where in the diaspora we are.

(via gradientlair)

Yes!!!

(via goldacrylicnails)

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gradientlair:

Prison Is Not Feminist: These photographs are of attendees at the exhibition of No Selves To Defend that was held on July 18, 2014 and were taken by photographer Sarah Jane Rhee. The sign was designed by Antonia Clifford.

According to @prisonculture, this is how they framed the actual exhibit:

We decided that we would anchor it with the stories of Celia (a 19th century enslaved black woman) and Marissa (a 21st century unjustly prosecuted black woman).

All of the photographs created with the sign can be seen on the Prison Is Not Feminist blog, and a few photos of the exhibit itself are on Prison Culture blog.

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Zoom heartsoulandcurves:

Hello… May you be amazing with great clothes and opportunities. 

heartsoulandcurves:

Hello… May you be amazing with great clothes and opportunities. 

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Zoom stylishangelita:

@judahavenue is an excellent photographer and look how cute her baby is in this pic! Follow @munamommy for more maternity and baby inspiration. #munamommy #munababy #baby #babyphotography #maternityphotography #cutekids #adorable #cuteness #babyfashion #naturalhair

stylishangelita:

@judahavenue is an excellent photographer and look how cute her baby is in this pic! Follow @munamommy for more maternity and baby inspiration. #munamommy #munababy #baby #babyphotography #maternityphotography #cutekids #adorable #cuteness #babyfashion #naturalhair

08.30.14 1
http://wocinsolidarity.tumblr.com/post/95918888140/mangoestho-harriet-tubman-was-one-of-the-first

mangoestho:

Harriet Tubman was one of the first ecofeminists but ppl sleep on her b/c she was a Black woman. But it takes such a vast and deep knowledge of geography, ecology, hydrology, soil science, sedimentology,etc to be able to come back and forth from The States to Canada and never get…

08.27.14 4834

thechanelmuse:

Meet Cory Nieves. He’s a dapper, 10-year old CEO of Mr. Cory’s Cookies who started his own booming cookie business in an effort to help his mom buy a car after moving from NYC to New Jersey in 2009.

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Zoom jessehimself:

Holding up a mirror to a riot officer… #Ferguson http://t.co/9p8GAZVnQn

jessehimself:

Holding up a mirror to a riot officer… #Ferguson http://t.co/9p8GAZVnQn

08.23.14 382

micdotcom:

Potent minimalist art sends a strong message about police and vigilante brutality in America

Journalist and artist Shirin Barghi has created a gripping, thought-provoking series of graphics that not only examines racial prejudice in today’s America, but also captures the sense of humanity that often gets lost in news coverage. Titled “Last Words,” the graphics illustrate the last recorded words by Brown and other young black people — Trayvon Martin, Oscar Grant and others — who have been killed by police in recent years.

Let us not forget their voices

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Can I just see you every morning when
I open my eyes
Can I just feel your heart beating beside me
Every night
Can we just feel this way together
Till the end of all time
Can I just spend my life with you

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